Don’t automatically make someone else’s dreams your dreams. Doing so can cause you to end up unfulfilled. I remember letting my ex-pastor know that his ministry was not my ministry, although I was willing to help him in his ministry. He didn’t like my response and wanted me to take on his dream, his ministry, as my own. Because I would not, then I was reprimanded.
It didn't feel good at the time. I found myself, as the praise leader, sitting down in the congregation to watch my wife and others lead to praise and worship service. He was embarrassing and uncomfortable, but it was a lesson worth learning. As I looked at my wife singing on the worship team, and she looked at me, we both knew that this was not a healthy situation. Immediately following the service, we went to the pastor and had a conversation with him, letting him know that we were no longer going to attend that church or being involved because of how the situation was handled. He accepted our leave and did nothing really to stop us at the time.
However, many many years later, we ran into the same pastor, and he apologized for his behavior. He admitted that what he had done was certainly not in God's wheel and was not the appropriate way to handle of a situation at all. I am so grateful that he was humble enough to admit his ear. I am also grateful that my wife and I did not stay in that situation.
I'm pretty proud of that pastor at how he didn't double down on his previous decision. I thank God for him because not many pastors will be willing to humble themselves in such a fashion.
If we would've stayed in that situation, I think it would've been detrimental to him (the pastor) it certainly to us as a married couple.